By Chandrama Anderson
E-mail Chandrama Anderson
About this blog: About this blog: I am a LMFT specializing in couples counseling and grief and have lived in Silicon Valley since 1969. I'm the president of Connect2 Marriage Counseling. I worked in high-tech at Apple, Stanford University, and in ... (More)
About this blog: About this blog: I am a LMFT specializing in couples counseling and grief and have lived in Silicon Valley since 1969. I'm the president of Connect2 Marriage Counseling. I worked in high-tech at Apple, Stanford University, and in Silicon Valley for 15 years before becoming a therapist. My background in high-tech is helpful in understanding local couples' dynamics and the pressures of living here. I am a wife, mom, sister, friend, author, and lifelong advocate for causes I believe in (such as marriage equality). My parents are both deceased. My son graduated culinary school and is heading toward a degree in Sociology. I enjoy reading, hiking, water fitness, movies, 49ers and Stanford football, Giants baseball, and riding a tandem bike with my husband. I love the beach and mountains; nature is my place of restoration. In my work with couples, and in this blog, I combine knowledge from many fields to bring you my best ideas, tips, tools and skills, plus book and movie reviews, and musings to help you be your genuine self, find your own voice, and have a happy and healthy relationship. Don't be surprised to hear about brain research and business skills, self-soothing techniques from all walks of life, suggestions and experiments, and anything that lights my passion for couples. (Author and Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Calif. Lic # MFC 45204.) (Hide)
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Happy Thanksgiving to all of you wonderful people! I'm grateful you read Couple's Net. I hope you continue to find value here. I'll keep writing to you.
There is much to be thankful for today. Look your beloved in the eye, say, "I love you," and hug belly to belly for a few minutes.
There are also a lot of disturbing and stressful things going on in the community, the state, the country and the world. As we get into focusing on these and any other inner turmoil, please add the words: "and I have many blessings" to the end of all your complaining sentences. Do it whether you say those things aloud or just in your head.
Many of your self-talk tapes spin endlessly in your mind. Use that phrase to rewire your brain. It may be that you say " . . . and I have many blessings" hundreds of times a day. That's okay. Do it anyway.